Vehicles and Animals


    Every day, cornerstones of human dignity are chiseled away by some corporate, political and/or religious interest. As these interests compete with each other to collect followers and receive declarations, the resulting conflict in the individual as he/she engages in society has bred an existential malaise that has the potential to subordinate the earth like the Nothing almost did in The Never Ending Story.


    Because of this, bands continue to make uninspired, pretentious bullshit. Here I must thank Athlete for Vehicles and Animals, their distilled and exceedingly mediocre contribution to the quagmire of our already insipidly wayward society. I’m sure life in London is great, but I would rather hear about it from the Clash or Elvis Costello. The Oasis-on-Quaaludes-in-the-Digital-Age thing just sounds boring and contrived.

    Should the soundtrack of our lives, then, include puppet bands as uninspired and pretentious as the dream of fast cash and rock-star status that lured so many into mediocrity? I’ll let you decide. But I think it should sound a lot like whatever wine-stained carpets, dandelions creeping through sidewalk cracks and sweat sounds like. You know, those unpredictable sounds, those moments of revolution.

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