Get Fucked

    Get Fucked


    Getting fucked is something that I looked forward to as a pimple faced teen. As my hormones began to kick in full blast, the idea of engaging in intercourse with a woman was not only unimaginable, it was impossible. I did imagine it, but I never knew my dream would one day come true. Sex was the only thought on my mind then. I never imagined that getting fucked would be low on my priority list, like it is today.


    After a 10-year hiatus, Get Fucked, a hardcore band hailing from South Philly, is back in action with an EP on Level Plane. Having never recorded before, their first self-titled CD release features full-on-get-out-of-my-way-or-I’m-gonna-kill-you noise. The EP calls to mind Anal Cunt — the songs are longer, but the chaotic, distorted screams and fist-swinging energy is there.

    Opener “Inside the 8lb. Dorm Fire” sets the mood for the rest of the album by slamming into vocal chord-swelling hardcore. If there could be a soundtrack for a wide awake nightmare, this is it. After the second track “Recipe for Patio Pieces,” I was amped and fucking pissed. I can’t remember why I was angry, all I knew is that I wanted more. So I turned the volume up louder. This second track has the speed of a Minor Threat song and the disjointed experimentation that could pass for a John Zorn cover. Vocalist (and assumed madman) Billy Willy screams with the fierceness of a wounded, captured beast.

    Every track is pretty much balls to the wall speed. The exception is “Exciting Irish Nativity.” Not only an example of the album’s bizarre song titles, it’s also a track that is less death metal and more melody. Don’t get me wrong: Willy still yelps his g’damned brains out.

    The sound quality here is good. Unlike most independent hardcore that’s circulating, these guys have recorded their shit right. Get Fucked is a good example of disjointed noise that when recorded well is simply amazing to rock out to.

    My only complaint about this record is that you can’t here what they’re saying. Just kidding. I’d be scared to know what the lyrics are about anyway. Really, my one grudge is that I wish the vocals were a bit louder. The angry rants I enjoy screaming along too are often buried under the band’s instrumental destruction.

    Don’t doubt my credibility as a human being here, I like to fuck like the next guy. Hell, I plowed my girlfriend all weekend long for chrissakes [insert high fives with a bunch of dudes here]. But other things take precedent over getting fucked these days. On the other hand, Get Fucked should be the only thing you think about until you buy it. Get fucking pissed. Go Get Fucked.