Shaq Releases Diss Track Aimed At LaVar Ball

    But in a rare move, he also compliments Ball's family

    Photo by Keith Allison

    Former NBA star and current Gold Bond spokesperson Shaquille O’Neal has released a diss track calling out LaVar Ball, the father of Los Angeles Lakers rookie Lonzo Ball.

    Over the past year, LaVar has been very outspoken about the transcendent basketball abilities of himself and Lonzo (as well as his younger son LaMelo) and the Ball family’s arrival into the national consciousness.

    In the lead up to the NBA Draft this past April, LaVar said that Lonzo “will only play for the Lakers,” who had the 2nd pick. The Balls are from Anaheim and Lonzo played college basketball at UCLA, but it’s rare for a player, much less the father of a player, to be so upfront about where a kid will be drafted.

    In March, LaVar made his family’s aspirations clear: “A billion dollars,” he said, referring to the money that can be made in the NBA via brand endorsements. “That’s our number, a billion, straight out of the gate. And you don’t even have to give it to me all upfront. Give us $100 mil over 10 years.”

    The elder Ball capped off all this braggadocio by saying, also in March, that he “would kill Michael Jordan one-on-one” back in his day.

    Of course, many people see these quotations and this posturing as a necessary gimmick if Lonzo and the Balls want to get ahead in the highly competitive NBA, especially as LaVar has launched his Big Baller Brand line.

    Shaq, however, threw some playful barbs at LaVar in his diss track. The track basically demands that LaVar bow to the king, Shaq Diesel.

    “I’ve been doing this a long time, when you was averaging two points, riding the pine.
    You see my t-shirts, you see my feet work, Big Baller Brand, that was me first,” he raps.

    Later, he boasts, “How many rings with Kobe, see you thought we had beef, how many accolades, how many ceremonies, I had whatever I want, Tony, Tony, Tony. You beat me? That’s a bunch of bologna. You think you’re Mailman, you ain’t even Jeff Maloney.”

    It goes on like this for a while, but Shaq, ever the PG rapper, can’t resist complimenting LaVar and his family by song’s end.

    It’s a nice sentiment when he raps, “Two more things I gotta say, you’ve done a great job, I love how your sons play. And li’l ‘Melo too, attitude hella cool, jumper wet wet like two thots in a pool.”

    No shots at Shaq, but “you’ve done a great job” is the worst diss in rap history.