Don't mess with Six Flags Fiesta Texas in San Antonio, as one fan of indie pop band Oh No! Oh My! recently learned. Robert Rich recently was denied entrance to the park for the depiction of cartoon cannibalism -- talk about twee as fuck! -- on his Oh No! Oh My! shirt. But Rich gets the last say. The sophomore journalism student at the University of Texas at Austin knows that the pen is mightier than the ticket puncher's ticket puncher. He wrote a column about the incident for the Palestine Herald-Press.

Here's what went down when he tried to get in:  

"The woman, after what seemed like ages of staring at my shirt, said, 'What’s that?' I informed her that it was for a band, and she replied with a simple 'Mmmhmm.' I tried to walk past her but she stopped me, saying 'If that’s what I think it is, I can’t let you into the park.' Here’s where it gets Cops-esque. She calls over a security guard and tells him, 'Look, they’re eating kids.' The guy doesn’t seem to want to make a call but eventually says that yes, it’s too offensive to be allowed into the park.

So Rich retreated to the parking lot and put on another shirt that just happened to be in his friend's car. Once inside, he noticed several shirts that met the gatekeeper's definition of not nearly as offensive as cartoon-depicted cannibalism:

"Throughout the course of the day, I learned some important lessons about what Six Flags will allow. These include: Nazi patriotism, as evidenced by the guy wearing a shirt with a swastika emblazoned on it; Emo/goth kids, as evidenced by the pink shirt worn by one depressing-looking individual that proudly stated “Dead Kids Living”; and finally, anti-feminine softcore porn, as evidenced by the shirt featuring two bikini-clad women laying on top of each other, with the words “Girls in Prison” printed under it. These images, ladies and gents, are all acceptable fare for entrance into the park, but cartoon baby eating is strictly off limits. I mean, kids are going to learn about Hitler anyway, so we might as well allow them to see swastikas, and the trendy way for youngsters to dress is emo because their dull, suburban-dwelling existences are so depressing. And degrading and objectifying women is simply the American way, because how can you call yourself a citizen unless you look at highly sexualized portrayals of homosexuality? But only with women, of course." [The Palestine Press-Herald via Daily Swarm]