Kasabian Threatened By More Talented Midget Poser

On the verge of Justin Timberlake's "Sexyback" being named the number one song in the U.K., ShowBizSpy has reported that Brit rockers Kasabian have launched an attack on JT calling him a "midget with whiskers" and declaring his music to be "rubbish." However, this is nothing more than a second rate attempt to create controversy much like fellow Brit rockers Oasis. In an attempt to figure out why this disgruntled group have taken offense to Mr. Timberlake, I have created a list of reasons of why they might be so bitter. The list is as follows:
  • Future Sex/Love Sounds is probably better than Empire: I won't lie, I haven't heard Empire yet, but there aren't many albums that will be better than Timberlake's album this year. I'd be mad too if I were a so called "indie rocker" and critics deemed my so called "authentic" music inferior to a pop album.

  • Justin Timberlake goes home to Cameron Diaz every night: Have you seen the members of Kasabian? With faces like that, there's no way they're landing a girl like Diaz, or even Timberlake's throw away girl Britney Spears.

  • Kasabian Can't Dance: I believe this quartet is salty because a fellow white man can actually dance and they can't, so they go out and say that Timberlake is trying to act black. This also makes Kasabian racists.

  • Timberlake got to work with Timbaland: Kasabian had to settle with DJ Shadow. Now I like DJ Shadow alot and I don't mean to disrespect (excessively, at least), but who would you rather work with right now? Exactly.

  • Timberlake sells more albums: Kasabian might have the current number one album in the U.K., but in a matter of time Timberlake will have the number one album in every nation under the sun. Simply put, this is player hating on the part of Kasabian.

  • As you can see, any reason they have to dislike Mr. Timberlake is predicated upon jealousy and is completely unfounded. And just so I don't come off as a total Timberlake fanboy, allow me to document my evolution in the Justin Timberlake Universe. When he first hit the scene I, like anyone who wasnt a 13 year old girl, laughed at him and dismissed him as a cookie cutter hack that would fade into obscurity in a matter of weeks. Then when N*Sync started selling a million albums a day, my hatred of Timberlake reached new heights. Timberlake started walking around in cornrows, beatboxing, and doing harm to the music world. I wished nothing but death to the man. But then Justified came out and destroyed one of the fundamental constants in my life. I actually became depressed that I liked the album and could not deny its level of quality. I was forced to respect Justin Timberlake. So when I read about anyone who is still trying to knock Timberlake for his past transgressions, it confuses me. If I can look past it all, anyone should be able to. Literally.
    [Source]
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    4 Responses

    September 5, 2006 at 1:18 p.m.

    not sure if going home with Cameron Diaz is anything to really brag about. just sayin'

    September 5, 2006 at 2:18 p.m.

    I think Cameron Diaz is pretty and she was a model before.JT's got a lot of haters out there.

    February 28, 2007 at 11:04 a.m.

    cameron diazI Googled for something completely different, but found your page...and have to say thanks. nice read.

    February 3, 2009 at 11:03 p.m.

    this is a ridiculous counter argument. Timberlake is a souless musician, selling millions of albums to idiots and dumb bitches in black stretch pants. Of course Kasabian is lashing out, because it is absurd that anyone would actually take JT seriously.

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