Black Eyed Peas Announce Hiatus

    Look, we dropped the ball around here yesterday. It was the most joyous news story since we killed Osama Bin Laden, and we didn’t get it because I’m the only one brazen enough to dance openly on their graves, and I was driving six hours to a cabin that has hardly usable wi-fi. So here it is: the Black Eyed Peas have announced that they are going on an indefinite hiatus, apparently deciding that their endless assault on our collective subconscious has run its course. Now, for some of us, this is bad news since it’s not a permanent breakup: The band instead says the break will be temporary. So, for now, let’s rejoice that for a while we won’t have any new Black Eyed Peas gum commercials, and no new adverts for Dr. Pepper featuring the group’s worst member. Oh wait. That is still happening. This party is ruined!