In case you have a sense of shame and don’t pay attention to what she’s doing, Aubrey O’Day is on a one-terrible singer mission to ruin songs from the ’80s. First she destroyed the already terrible “Party All the Time,” which is an astounding accomplishment since Eddie Murphy’s was 13 kinds of awful. Now she’s decided to change New Order’s “Bizarre Love Triangle,” a defining slice of ’80s electro-pop with a tender emotional center, into “Never Fallin’,” a song about Internet haters who are mean to her. She even changed the chorus to this:
Every time they see us ballin’
They get down on their knees and hate
Waiting for the day we fall off so
They can come and take our place
I’m unsure as to why hating requires getting on your knees, and why anyone would want to take the place of a hardly famous former member of a TV-manufacured girl group that had a really, really terrible name. Which I guess makes me a hater.
Here’s an open letter to New Order:
Dear New Order,
Did you approve Aubrey O’Day’s New Order sample on “Never Fallin’?” If so, I hope you guys got paid, and well. Buy a new boat. If not, please sue her promptly.