I'm just glad the damn thing is coming out so we can move on with our lives. As a gadget junkie, I really want to like the iPhone - I think the touchscreen is a great new approach to things, and look forward to seeing it stolen and adapted for other phones. The screen is gorgeous, the interface is elegant (and undoubtedly a little simplistic, in classic Apple fashion). There are a number of things that will keep me from shelling out the five (or six, for the 8GB edition) bills.

1. Slow data connection. For a superphone that's all hotted up on the Interwebs, not using Cingular's 3G data connection is unfathomable, especially for such an expensive item. My Blackjack, that cost maybe $80 after rebates has it -why not a $499 iPhone? Some people speculate that this was done to conserve battery life - why not have a switch to turn it off? Others point to the WiFi inclusion as a reason to skip 3G. Those people clearly haven't experienced the convenience of broadband 3G wherever you have a cell signal.


2. The keyboard. The keyboard. The - well, there's no keyboard. There's a virtual keyboard that isn't nearly accurate enough to allow for dual thumb typing, that Apple demo's have avoided using, that texting and e-mail happy folks will go nuts trying to use. Supposedly it has great spell check correction, but this is something I'd have to verify for myself first.


3. No over-the-air downloading of iTunes tracks. The Zune has WiFi, and most people agree doesn't use it to any good useful effect. The iPhone had the opportunity, as the first wireless iPod, to make purchasing tracks a seamless experience through the device itself. Apple hasn't done it, at least not out of the box.


4. No third-party apps, and no IM client. Some say the iPhone isn't a real smartphone, because you can't install third-party applications. That may be short-sighted, but for the geeks who like using their phones as GPS units, or foodies who download the Zagat guide onto their handset, the iPhone will get stale awfully quickly. Apple has some half-assed solution where developers can make "apps" work for the iPhone's web browser, but opening a web browser to use Yahoo IM or a shopping list app seems clunky and counter to the iPhone's streamlined appeal.

Six more after the break!

5. No video recording. Whuh? You've got 4 or 8 gigs of storage, every camera phone and smartphone has supported this for years, and you can't record video on your iPhone? It should record video and have a button to automatically upload it to YouTube, in this day and age.


6. No SIM card slot - you better like AT&T. I actually have AT&T, and have few complaints about the service here in San Francisco. Still, not having a SIM card means no way to sneak this phone over to T-Mobile, and no way to get a cheap international SIM card when you travel overseas - you'll just have to suck up the roaming fees. SIM cards are also nice for carting over your contacts and phone number between multiple phones - so much for flipping between your iPhone and your Razr for those who like to have their phone match their wardrobe.


7. An even better mugging target than white earbuds. The odd part of me that likes urban chaos can't wait for tomorrow - with no pre-orders, limited supplies, and ravenous fan-boys, things will get ugly in spots. Way to drum up publicity Apple! The iPhone will be the new hip target for muggers this fall.


8. No Bluetooth stereo. Most new music phones have the capability let you listen to music wirelessly, with Bluetooth headphones, or streaming to your car stereo deck. The iPhone lets you use those Star Trek headsets for communication, but you'll be using standard wired headphones for music.


9. Apple on Windows = terrible things. Apple recently released their Safari browser for Windows, and hit a bunch of bugs and security issues. Their track record with iTunes on Windows is consistently poor, with recent issues corrupting iPods under Vista. Now I could potentially lose my music, contacts, and all the other notes and scraps I store on my phone? Not an issue for the Mac users out there, but for the other 90% using Windows, a real concern.


10. There will be a better one in a year. Or so. This one's not really Apple's fault - technology marches ceaselessly forward, and while Apple is known for refining their iPods in a million iterations, at least they usually give some head's up so you're not stuck with last year's technology. Still, there's so many little items that could be improved, a new version of the iPhone is sure to make early adopters cringe a bit when it comes out.

And thus ends the player hating. For all you getting a new spiffy phone tomorrow, enjoy it -there's a lot of things Apple got right, and to borrow from a conversation I had yesterday, the phrase "Do you want to see this YouTube video on my iPhone?" will undoubtedly be replacing bad pick-up lines across the country. God bless you, Steve Jobs.