Wu-Week: The bottom feeders

    I love Wu-Tang, but let’s be honest: The Clan’s extended fam (which includes more than thirty individuals and a solid handful of groups) is largely unspectacular. In fact, it’s acceptable at best, embarrassing at worst. It’s about time we call out the bottom feeders of the Wu-Tang food chain. It’s not even worth putting these in order. 

     

    U-God

    Claim to shame: Wait, how did he get on here? He’s so bad, sometimes it’s easy to forget he’s actually in the Clan.

     

    Cappadonna

    Claim to shame: Yes, he may now be considered an official member, and there are affiliates worse than ol’ Cap, but none of them (at least to our knowledge) had an FBI informant for a manager or lived as a homeless cab driver after appearing on Wu-Tang Forever and Ironman.

     

    Bronze Nazareth

    Claim to shame: Nothing against Bronze Nazareth except that he has a terrible name. So bad it’s worth pointing out.

     

    Northstar
    Claim to shame: These dudes got a lot of unwarranted hype leading up to their first album, Bobby Digital Presents Northstar. Marketed as RZA’s West Coast protégés, they managed to serve up two albums of hot doo-doo that nobody listened to.  

     

    Blue Raspberry

    Claim to Shame: This quote from Wikipedia should say it all: “Blue Raspberry is a singer affiliated with the Wu-Tang Clan. Her stage name was given to her by Killah Priest, who said she reminded him of a blue raspberry.  Discovered by the Wu-Tang Clan when working in a casino, Blue Raspberry emerged as the group’s in-house female vocalist during the first round of Wu-Tang solo projects. She added vocals to tracks on Method Man’s Tical and Raekwon’s Only Built 4 Cuban Linx, but seemed to have her position somewhat usurped by Tekitha on the Clan’s second album, Wu-Tang Forever.

     

    Killah Priest

    Claim to shame: Renamed a casino singer Blue Raspberry. 

     

    Shabazz the Disciple

    Claim to shame: Anyone who releases an album entitled The Passion of the Hood Christ gets an automatic pass to the Worst Wu Affiliates list.

     

    Cilvaringz
    In addition to having a shaky grasp on the English language, this Moroccan-born, Netherlands-residing producer/rapper is a groupie who tirelessly stalked the Wu until they gave him affiliate status. It’s also rumored that Cilvaringz made several trips to New York, waiting for hours outside of the RZA’s office just to get his demo tape heard. And apparently the RZA didn’t want to sign him, citing his lack of lyrical skills. If that doesn’t make him worthy for this list, I don’t know what does.

     

    P.R. Terrorist

    Claim to shame: I didn’t even know this dude existed until I found him on the Wu-Tang corporate website. He must really suck if Cilvaringz gets his entire life story told on his page and P.R. Terrorist has nothing but N/A across his.